It's been a crazy ride the past 6-9 months....Let me try and condense it...
Most of you who know us know that our family was deeply involved in a church named Parkway since about 2005. It was our home, our family, pretty much most of our life.
We attended on the weekends, served in different ministries every weekend, led a small group weekly, were involved in many different service projects, mission trips, etc etc etc....99% of our friends were from Parkway. We were challenged, loved, included, and supported there. We've been through a LOT since moving to AZ and most of it, our Parkway family went through with us...
I have SO many memories from that place...bringing Mia home from Vietnam and bringing her to PCC to meet everyone...putting her in child care and worrying so much because she screamed and cried for 10 minutes every time, but the patient and special ladies in there held her, loved her and calmed her down and allowed me to stay in the service.
I remember being a part of "Perkway", which included setting up the auditorium in a coffee house type style and serving cookies and coffee to the guests. I joined a team called "Forward Drive" and took 2 trips to CA to observe another church and the way they did things. I was involved in a "garage sale", a silent auction, backpack/school supply drive. We "adopted" needy families at Xmas time and I helped organize the distribution of the gifts. We "adopted" the teachers, staff and students at a low income school in El Mirage and held teacher appreciation breakfasts, helped at their spring fair, helped in the classrooms, obtained a wheelchair for a child whose parents couldn't afford one, helped in the library and more.
I loved the "hospitality" team and served with my small group girls. We would come, once a month and prepare and serve food and drinks to the people attending the "Loop" classes.
There were barbeques, girls nights, womens breakfasts, retreats, bible studies, classes....(ok,I'm about to cry now...)
There is so much more and I don't write all these things to brag, but to remember and have a record of what we've been involved with and honor the church and all it stood for.
Helayna grew up at Parkway...she was 10 when she started attending the youth ministry and met so many Godly women who loved her and still play a huge role in her life. I truly believe that it takes a whole town to raise children and Parkway is our town. I feel like Helayna has at least 5 women who truly love her and have looked out for her and been an influence on her and her faith. They have been like 2nd moms and I can't even express my gratitude to them. They have helped me do the hardest job of raising a teenager and I feel like God put them in our lives for that reason.
Helayna went to Haiti and I feel that it changed the trajectory of her life. I cannot wait to see what God has in store for her and I feel like this church has helped form her into the beautiful woman she is becoming today.
Eric was involved in a mens accountability group and led our small group for years. They are still some of our best friends and we have so many amazing memories.
Eric led missions to Haiti and fell in love with the country and the people there. He's met with many different leaders and talked to different people about missions and he will never be the same.
When the earthquake happened in Haiti, our whole church prayed together and raised money to help.
When we brought Sebastian home 2 years early and had NOTHING that we needed, Parkway pulled together and within 2 days, we had everything we needed and more....our doorbell rang almost every hour and people we didn't even know would leave things on our porch like diapers, wipes, clothing, toys and so much more. We didn't have to buy diapers for a year! I have never felt so much love and support and I remember sitting in a service while Trent spoke about us bringing Seb home, and I just started to weep...in appreciation and love for my church family. I just couldn't believe how a group of people could ban together like that and support our family.
I truly have never felt love like that before. When we brought him home and to church, everyone embraced him with open arms (literally). He was like a little star! Everyone knew his story and how he came home because of the earthquake and instantly loved him. (how could you not? with that smile...) I still see people out and about who say "hi sebastian!" and I don't even know them!
Parkway was, and is unique and there will NEVER be anything like it again. God blessed that place and created a family whose ties can never be broken. Something about it was just different...and we all knew it. We all felt it, appreciated it and will always treasure it. It's so hard to explain such a deep emotion, but those of you who were a part of it know what I mean.
So.....when we "merged" with another church at the beginning of 2011, all I can say is it wasn't the same anymore. Intentions were good, hearts were in the right place, but something just didn't work. People were hurt, upset, confused and lost. (including me) I don't want to rehash the whole thing, but let's suffice it to say Parkway was fading....and we couldn't bring it back. I'm still not sure what God was thinking, but some things we just don't need to know, I guess. Some things we just aren't meant to understand.
We tried for months to feel a connection and keep attending, but it just didn't work. We tried to keep serving (me in the cafe, Eric in youth) but after a while, I couldn't do it anymore.
We visited other churches, but nothing stuck. I was lost...not sure who to talk to about it, not sure what to do or where to go.
I truly felt like I lost everything...I know that sounds dramatic. But when something is such a huge part of your life and you lose it without having any say, it's devastating. I felt like I lost my family, my pastor, my small group, the ministry I served in, and a lot of my friends. We all scattered...and I'm not sure why, but a lot of us didn't talk about it or confide in each other. It was almost taboo to talk about where we were going or what we were thinking or feeling. I still don't understand this, but I think we were just so lost and confused,and we didn't want to hurt feelings, so we just kept it to ourselves. We tried to be positive but it sure was hard. It caused tension in our family too and that was hard. It was a confusing and difficult time. I cried a lot, prayed a lot and spent time trying to understand what this was....
I felt drawn to a church about 20 min away, Eric didn't. He felt drawn to stay at CCV in the youth ministry...I didn't. We agreed to disagree and tried to respect each others feelings and figured eventually it would work out. But inside, I was devastated. I wanted to be a part of something, I wanted my "family" back, I didn't want to be stagnant, as I was feeling...I prayed and prayed and prayed...God seemed to be saying "wait"...which I am NOT good at!
We went from a family who, without a question, attended church every single weekend unless physically impossible...to a family who was starting to make excuses and found other things that were more important to attend. I was so confused...this wasn't US. I didn't like what this was doing to us but I didn't know how to get out of it.
We seemed to be in this holding pattern...and one day in late November, Eric received a call from our former childrens pastor at Parkway, saying that he was "thinking" of starting a new church. We were on our way to lunch, so Eric told him he'd call him back. But, from the first second I heard about this possibility, I was giddy with excitement and I prodded Eric during our entire lunch to call him back and find out details! I could not WAIT to hear more...
They played phone tag a couple times and I was dying to know more.....seriously, I am NOT patient!!!
Eventually, he told him he didn't have many details, but we were invited to their house for an informational meeting the first Sunday in December. I could NOT WAIT!!!!! It was the first time in months, I felt positive about something.(don't get me wrong, I didn't walk around depressed, negative about the world...it was just this church thing....)
Soooo.....we met with about 20 other people (all from Parkway) and it was just so exciting! It felt positive...there was no church-bashing, no negativity just a bunch of people who felt the same way we did...lost and without a church home. We all wanted to create the same type of family feeling and we all wanted to serve people and none of us were currently doing that for one reason or another. From that first meeting, I just KNEW this was going to be big.
Eric and I hardly even had to discuss it...we both felt the same and knew we wanted to be a part of this from the start.
We have met every Sunday since then (except the week after Christmas) and every time, more people come and it just gets more and more exciting....
We have decided to be a part of the "core" group of 35 who helps to start this church....so WE ARE STARTING A CHURCH!!!!!!!!! And we couldn't be more excited, more thrilled, more happy about what God is going to do...
We met for the first time this past Saturday at the location where we will meet officially and my wheels started to turn the second we walked in...
I will be part of the "first impressions" team and also be involved with small groups and the womens ministry. Eric will be on the youth leadership team and he can't wait to start having input on how this ministry will work. He is working with one of our best friends and I think they'll be a great team!
We are SO excited and now, I can see God's perfect timing in all of this. Even if I still don't understand why Parkway had to be "sacrificed", I am starting to see good in all of this and starting to feel like myself again.
I am constantly reminded that God knows best, knows all and is always good. He has been there with us the whole way, even if I checked out for a bit myself...which I'm not proud of. Luckily, He is patient and forgiving and loves us unconditionally. I would've been frustrated and upset with me if I were Him...because at times, I have to admit, I questioned Him and wondered why??? But, I am seeing a light at the end of the tunnel now and I feel stronger for having gone through that tunnel. And I feel like our core group has this bond now, after going through a trial together which wouldn't have happened otherwise. I am getting to know people I didn't know well before and they are becoming my family. And the ones I did know well...we are becoming closer.
We started planning last night with our different teams and there is SO much to be done and I have to admit, it was overwhelming...but I am up for the challenge and excited to get started! Our first official service will most likely be on Sat Feb 25th at 4pm.
I can't wait to get going with this church!!!!!! I can't wait to see what God has planned! I can't wait!!!!!!!
So, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.....
If you are interested in "just church" (the official name), go to: http://www.just-church.com/
Thanks for being patient while I shared my heart....and thanks for being a part of our life:)
Lots of love,
Michele
